I HATE CONFRONTATION

Confrontation has always been a problem for me. Rather the correct way to go about it. To resolve conflicts and end resentments. The absolute worst thing I have ever had to do was to fire some one. Not many years ago I was a department manager responsible for my employees. To have to "let someone go" was agony. I would get physically ill, nausea, my whole body shaking.

Though that is not what I have going on today, I thought it important to mention, so I could better convey my reluctance to confront others with unpleasant business.

In the past I would let my displeasure with the words or actions of others go on until I exploded, this never turned out well. The only other option I had, if possible, was to completely remove myself from the person that I had allowed to hurt me. When confronted by others I become very defensive, rejecting the thought I could possible be wrong. So, I have done a good job of losing a great many relationship by my inability to confront and resolve problems.

Today, I am learning to face problems with others, as painfull as it may be, in hopes to continue, improve and re-establish relationships with those I care for, both friends and family. It seems, I must also look at my part in these conflicts, to consider what I may have done to contribute and be prepared to be confronted with facts I never considered. Understanding that the problem may not be resolved, my efforts rejected is a possibility, I am finding, for which I must also prepare.

When all is said and done, I pray most of all, that I hold no resentments. That I may have the ability to let go, to put difficult issues behind me, to enjoy the relationships I have, to love without condition. God help me confront, applying spiritual principles, to resolve conflicts.